The Toronto Raptors have acquired Chris Paul. I should probably lead with that, although it feels like something I dreamt after eating too much takeout. It was a three team deal involving the Clippers and the Nets, which is usually how these things happen. People move around, papers get signed, and we all try to remember who plays where now.
Chris Paul is a 12 time All Star and one of the greatest to ever do it (his words or mine, it does not matter). He is also currently 40 years old and averaging 2.9 points per game. My uncle has a similar stat line at the YMCA, but he usually wears knee braces that squeak. Paul will not be reporting to Toronto, which is fair, considering the weather just turned that particular shade of grey that makes you want to stare at a wall.
The Logistics of Saying Goodbye
To make this happen, the Raptors sent Ochai Agbaji and a 2032 second round pick to Brooklyn. A 2032 draft pick feels like something from a science fiction movie. By then, we might have flying cars, or maybe the draft will be conducted by a sentient toaster. Agbaji played 42 games for us this year and averaged 4.3 points, which is a very respectable number of points if you are not trying to win a scoring title.
The Clippers save some tax money, and the Nets get some cash to cover salaries. This is mostly about the luxury tax, a thing that sounds like a fee you pay to stay at a fancy hotel but is actually just a way for rich people to talk about other rich people. Toronto is now out of that tax, which I am sure makes someone in an office very happy.
Other Things That Happened
Elsewhere in the league, Atlanta acquired Jock Landale for cash. It is always interesting when a human being is traded for cash, like a used lawnmower or a vintage comic book. Landale goes to Georgia, and the cash presumably goes into a bank account. Basketball is a beautiful game.
There are also rumors about Nick Richards. Apparently Phoenix has his contract and they were thinking about sending it to Toronto, then they didn't, but now they might again. It is like that one friend who keeps saying they are going to come over to help you move, but then they keep "checking their calendar."
The Raptors played the Timberwolves tonight while all of this was swirling around. It is hard to focus on a game when you realize your team just traded for a Hall of Famer who will never actually put on the jersey. It reminds me of the time I bought a treadmill and left it in the box for three years. It was technically mine, and I felt more athletic just knowing it was in the house.
Chris Paul plans to retire at the end of the season. He told a magazine he was at peace with everything. That must be nice. I am still not at peace with the 2007 trade that sent Jamario Moon to the Heat, but we all process grief differently. We will see if the front office flips Paul before the deadline tomorrow, or if we just keep his name on the roster like a nice piece of art we aren't allowed to touch.